Yesterday I was booking down the street on the way to my bus stop- when a "homeless" guy asked me if I wanted to buy a copy of "Real Change" (which is a local paper that homeless people can sell as a legitimate way to make some dough). When I say asked I should say he growled it while not really looking at me, after just doing a "hey baby" to a gal who just walked by. I shook my head and kept walking- the second I passed him he spit at my feet. Normally I'd be "Whatever, loser" but it had so much venom and hate behind it I actually got really shook up about it. BECAUSE- I've been notcing this alot lately! Skanky ass guys spit very vocally as I pass by lately. What the fuck is that? I can't imagine it's only me. It must be some wierd female hating thing. It's not because I'm a bitch either- because I'm usually pretty cool to people who aren't aggresively bugging me. Anyway- my eyesight almost literally went red at that moment with anger and I wished a very violent curse on him before I knew what I was doing. I don't think that's the healthiest way to deal, but maybe humanity IS fucked. I have a friend who says civilization is only the thinnest of veneers, it can crack instantly and you'd better be ready. I like to think that people act aggresively out of thier own hurts and that should be compassionately addressed-but sometimes I just don't give a fuck.
Anyway it really bothered me all the way home...I even tried to tire myself out with a bike ride but I just felt wierd and disillusioned.
Until...I switched on the TV and "Star Trek-The Wrath of Khan" was on! Yeah! Somehow, stupidly- that made things better because I was watching Capt Kirk and Khan overdramatically duking it out. It reinvigorated my appreciation for art and creativity- because someone made that movie- and alot of the reason they did it was (yes, money, but more importantly) FUN! God bless people who make an effort and do something constructive with thier lives other than spitting at girls on the street.