PLEASE GOD, JUST LET A COUGAR EAT ME
Looking at this list of embalming products makes me convinced I would NEVER want to be buried. (Example : This product is bactericidal, fungicidal, viricidal, pseudomonacidal and tuberculocidal and exerts a deodorizing effect with a pleasant mint smell")...Throw me in a fire or feel me to the fishes...just not this rediculous waste of time. There of course is the option of having your cremated remains sent into space...but I suspect you might not enjoy it all that much...since you'd be DEAD.

IT IS NOT I WHO IS CRAZY...
Back when I was a dorky little kid living in Canada- I really liked this kid's show called the Wombles. Wombles were these sort of rat-things who played in a band...I remember being facinated and slightly horrified by them. Anyway- no-one in the States ever believed the show existed- that it was a product of my dementedly fertile imagination- but now I have proof!

SONG TO THE SIREN

Long afloat on shipless oceans
I did all my best to smile
til your singing eyes and fingers
drew me loving into your eyes.
And you sang "Sail to me, sail to me;
...Let me enfold you.
Here I am, here I am waiting to hold you..."

Did I dream you dreamed about me?
Were you here when I was full sail?
Now my foolish boat is leaning, broken lovelorn on your rocks.
For you sang, "Touch me not, touch me not,.. come back tomorrow."
Oh my heart, oh my heart shies from the sorrow.

I'm as puzzled as a newborn child.
I'm as riddled as the tide.
Should I stand amid the breakers?
Or shall I lie with death my bride?
Hear me sing: "Swim to me, swim to me, let me enfold you...
Here I am, Here I am, waiting to hold you..."